Thursday, May 08, 2008

Breathing Lessons

I've taken to writing out my schedule the nite before. I'm finding that this really relaxes me. Knowing what's ahead and alloting time for it releases me from having to think about all I have to get done. Not that it doesn't leave time for procrastination, that still gets in the mix, and I am open to the schedule changing during the day as things arrange themselves, but it does make me feel like things can get done. And gives me more time in the day! Sometimes I'm ahead of schedule, which is cool. The main thing is it's teaching me that I can only get so much done in a day and I don't have to feel bad for not getting my whole mental list done. Sticking to the drawing in the morning and it's really great. Already feeling a sense of relief, that there's no pressure in the drawing, that if I don't get any work done in the day because of the whole move scenario, at least I've drawn. It keeps my brain alive. I feel like someone is momentarily whispering "Wake up Sleeping Beauty" and I discover the world around me in a new and connected way.

I've also started something new, knitting! Ok, like you have time, you say...but, you know what? It's really relaxing, well after I let myself relax and realize I don't have to get it perfect and I'm learning. Do you know what? If you make a mistake, you can fudge it! Like that. Though sometimes you have to rip it all out, but that's ok, because it's not about the product, it's about the process. It's a nice way to socialize and pick up a meditative habit. What's more meditative than making the same movement over and over in a focused way. It's not drawing and it's not painting, but I think in some way it is going to help all that. So, big huge thanks to Pauline at She has tons of patience and is just, well, nice. If you're in the Hague and need a break from all the stress, try it out.

Yoga today also, was WONDERFUL. It is in the 20s (celcius) and I did it on the roof terrace in the sun. A little difficult to drag myself off to putting Ikea furniture together again, but I'm in the right mindset now. Even got a bit of chanting meditation in.

THIS, is who I want to be...a peaceful, creative person. NOT, the person who worries about the future without living today. Every morning, on my walk with Leon, I say this to myself, "There is no future, there is no past, there is only this moment." And yes, Pauline, it reminds me to do what you reminded me is so essential, "Breathe."


Anonymous said...

Hi Kim,
Just to let you know I am enjoying your blog. Sounds like you working out a great balance for your days. I am a list maker and seldom get it all done, but it does help me remember that I have accomplished something each day. Your drawing is so important! Keep it at the top of the list. Hello to Leon from my cat Leo.
Aunt Donna

Anonymous said...

whoops: "you are working"

kim said...

Hi Aunt Donna: Thanks for your message. I'm far from getting caught up in spite of my lists, but as you say, it does give one a sense of accomplishment to mark at least one thing done during the day! Thank you for your comments regarding my drawing! Yes, it is primary for me. Leon says hello to Leo from across the pond.

Love, Kim